Basking in the Bliss of Baths and Bargains

Posted by on May 17, 2018 in Blog | 0 comments

There’s nothing like seeing a product I use slapped with a clearance sticker as the cheaper it is the higher my euphoria rises.  Ever since I received a box of cubed bath fizzies years ago I’ve been enthralled by them.  It’s almost scientific when you think about it because when placed in warm or hot water the bath bomb effervesces similar to that of an Alka-Seltzer except in a bathtub.  Having used several types of bath melts including round, squared and even oval-shaped they really are totally tubular because the hotter the water the quicker they fizz and bubble up thus dissipating leaving the water colored, scented (unless they’re free of fragrance and dye) and one’s skin softer.  Using a red bath bomb could be the ultimate prank for a couple of reasons.  The first could be used by a female screaming for her boyfriend, fiancé or husband to come into the bathroom and when he sees the water is all red he’ll think it’s blood and she could tell him she’s miscarrying terrifying the poor bastard then immediately yell “April Fools!” or “Psych!” at which point he’ll probably fall to the floor while clutching his chest.  The other could be if a couple both have large amounts of life insurance policies on each other and one wants to pretend they were murdered while in the bathtub which may result in the spouse walking in and becoming so horrified at the sight they could end up having a fatal heart attack or a stroke.  Cha-Ching!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!    While I enjoy what bath fizzers have to offer I can’t and won’t buy them unless they’re on clearance since even 1/2 off is often times too pricey.  For example, the product da Bomb Bath Fizzers were ingeniously created by two sisters when they were an astonishing ten and eleven-years-old.  To be entrepreneurs at that age is truly estimable but at the same time I just can’t justify spending $7.50 or even $5.00 for each bath bomb when I could buy four of them for the same price as just one.  While there are numerous bath bombs on the market including ones you could make yourself which are all similar to each other in size basically equivalating to that of a tennis ball they’re too costly for me but I must admit one of da Bombs clever names appropriately called “F” Bomb in reference to someone dropping the “F” Bomb only in this case in a bathtub is classic.   Several days ago I was walking through my favorite part of a department store, the clearance section and happened up on a box of four squared bath melts 1/2 off the original price bringing it down to  $4.99.  Each square is the same size as a bomb so instead of spending $5.00 for one I got four.  That’s a deal.  I’m not one of those fanatical couponers who hands the cashier an entire stack thus forcing the person or people behind her or him to wait impatiently along with possibly having the urge to take that same pair of scissors they used to clip their coupons and begin stabbing that aggravating couponer with them.  But that doesn’t mean I don’t like to save money.  All I know is that bath fizzers are a fun yet often times overpriced product so when that delightful clearance sticker is placed on the front of the item I can almost hear the bath fizzie bubbling up as it anxiously awaits my purchase.        ...

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Glitter Saves the Day on the First of May

Posted by on May 1, 2018 in Blog | 0 comments

Today is the nicest day of 2018 despite getting over a nasty cold.  So each month I change the glitter text on my site and often times it’s a challenge deciding which shade to use.  As of recently; however, I’ve begun realizing that the colors are the same and the variety isn’t that abundant.  I went to the site to change it yet again but there was a glitch which prevented me from doing anything.  I tried several more times and started to panic since I’ve been using this same site for sparkle ever since creating my distinctive website.  While there are other sites to generate glitter I’ve always been afraid that using it might damage something thus preventing the text from appearing on the homepage at all since computers and pretty much all forms of technology hate me.     I checked several sites and after deciding which one to take a chance on I cautiously went on while silently praying no viruses would attack my computer and when I started searching the colored text they offer I was completely blown away.  Multi-colored glitter and other designs the previous site didn’t offer.  After choosing the most perfectly colored blue I followed the exact steps as I have for years and thankfully my text is stunningly gleaming.  I can’t believe the diversity in hues and designs available and actually began going through several of them to see how they look adorned in my far-out name.  It totally made my day.   I’m now going to sit out in the sun while closing my eyes envisioning many of the majestic glitters which will sparkle and shine each month.  Like fer shur!!!!!!!...

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Poultry Frenzy

Posted by on Apr 30, 2018 in Blog | 0 comments

I don’t care what people say about how unhealthy they believe fast-food is.  The bottom line is that it tastes great and if you think about it more and more eateries have become health conscious by adding salads to their menus and incorporating fruits and vegetables in their kids’ meals.  While I enjoy the food from most fast-food chains I’m majorly disappointed that my absolute favorites Jack in the Box and Carl’s Jr. are West Coast franchises since I now live clear across the country.     I do; however, have hope now that Chick-fil-A has rolled into town.  I’d never even heard of it but plenty of others have.  I looked it up and surprisingly there’s one in 48 of the 50 states which is quite impressive.  By the way people acted prior to its grand opening a little more than two weeks ago you’d have thought Willy Wonka was re-opening his chocolate factory for the first hundred people since that was the number of people required to stand in line for at least 24 hours and once the doors opened they’d receive a voucher for 52 meals which includes a chicken sandwich, medium waffle fry and medium drink.  Apparently that was the deal of a lifetime for many since people actually camped out overnight in tents.  No amount of free food could warrant me sleeping in a frickin’ tent or standing in line for the entire day and night.  Crazy bastards.   On the morning the restaurant opened one would have thought the hottest actor in the movies (whoever that currently is) was arriving.  Cameramen, people dressed up as cows and others as jubilant as could be anxiously awaiting the doors to open.  So the first 100 people get a 52 meals free while the rest must stand in line for who knows how long so they could sink their teeth into a sandwich or whatever other item they choose.   I definitely want to try Chick-fil-A and hopefully will soon despite the traffic, especially the drive-thru.  The place must be great since several days ago when I passed by I honestly thought there was an accident due to the three police cars with their flashing lights on only to discover they were directing vehicles thus avoiding congestion or, as some might refer to it as a clusterf*ck or in this case a clustercluck.  All due to Chick-fil-A.  I must give props to the establishment which is closed on Sundays, something that’s truly a thing of the past.  They also observe Thanksgiving Day, Christmas Day and Easter Sunday which is commendable.     Now if only Jack in the Box and Carl’s Jr. would follow suit we’d be all set.  At least in terms of...

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Posted by on Apr 20, 2018 in Blog | 0 comments

                                                       I’ve been waiting for the right time to write about this most ideal of topics and upon discovering the inception of April 20th, also referred to as 420, 4:20 or 4/20 it couldn’t be any more appropriate.  It all began back in February when I mentioned to a co-worker the irony of how Valentine’s Day was on Ash Wednesday and April Fool’s Day happened to fall on Easter Sunday.  Then he said “Then there’s April 20th” but I didn’t know the significance of it that is until he told me it’s a term for smoking pot.  Am I the only person on the planet who was completely unaware of this?  As a result I became so fascinated with the origin of the date and people that I did some research and learned 4/20 is indeed a code term in the world of cannabis especially when it’s smoked at 4:20 either a.m. or p.m.     It all came about in 1971 at San Rafael High School in Marin Country, California by a group of five stoner friend who called themselves “the Waldo’s.”  According to legend 4:20 became a code for their marijuana use.  Little did they know the rippling effect their toking pastime and cipher would become once it reached the Grateful Dead which helped to launch the term making 4/20 the worldwide code it is today.     While that story is quite noteworthy I’ve got one which takes the word naivety to new and possibly unknown levels.  Seeing that I’ve never been around any type of drugs (not to sound self-righteous I’ve just never had an interest in inhaling nor ingesting any type of illegal substance) I’m unable to distinguish one from another.  One day I was waiting on a black female and was immediately hit with the most horrid stench I presumed to be skunk piss.  It reeked all around her and I actually thought to myself “Was this ghetto chick just peed on by a skunk?”  Maybe if I’d have mentioned this to someone they would have explained the truth behind my zany misconception but I didn’t think it was a big deal, that was until it happened several more times with the exact repugnant odor emanating from the same ethnicity.  I really started to wonder whether black people lived in the country or just had skunks nearby who would typically urinate all over them.     About a month or so went by then one evening a young black couple came in and I was once again hit with that same putrid funk but once they left and I instantly began spraying Febreze all around when an employee nearby said “Whew!  That’s some strong pot!”  Then it suddenly dawned on me.  That overpowering almost to the point of nauseating stink I kept smelling from one black person to another wasn’t skunk piss, though it couldn’t have possibly smelled any closer to it.  It was pot!!!!!!!!  How unworldly could I have been?  After that another co-worker explained in detail the definition of a hotbox which was almost mortifying.  We must remember that 80sgirl is stuck in an era far removed from the modern world consisting of unnumbered tech-loving clones who can’t come up with a single original thought or saying as they continue to use the same up-to-date lingo as their peers.  “Omigod we’re gonna get so lit tonight!”  Real trendsetters.  But back to me.  Upon learning this...

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Dreamcatcher and a Cross

Posted by on Apr 13, 2018 in Blog | 0 comments

Since today is Friday the 13th what better time to write of two objects which are rarely associated with each other?  That is until now.  Sometimes referred to as “Sacred Hoops” and created by American Indians, dreamcatchers are handmade crafts consisting of a round hoop (traditionally made with willow wood) that’s woven in a loose web of yarn and decorated with feathers or other type of various material such as beads, fringe, tassels and even bone just to name a few which hangs below the hoop.  They were hung above the beds to protect people sleeping, usually children from bad dreams and evil spirits.  Legends depicted that the spider web design of the dreamcatcher would allow good dreams to pass through and float down the hanging beads and feathers to sleeping children while bad dreams would become caught in the web and as the first rays of the morning light hit the dreamcatcher the bad dreams would disappear.     Whether or not there’s any validity to the folklore is anyone’s guess as children aren’t the only ones who have nightmares.  In fact,  I actually have a dreamcatcher which hangs not above but rather directly behind my bed yet I continue to have terrifying dreams but that may have something to do with the plethora of real-life crime shows I watch before going to sleep.  But who’s to say dreamcatchers’ only purpose is to ensure the person or people who slumber have pleasant dreams?  So I decided to hang another one made up of multi-colored beads intricately entwined into the web alongside a feather resembling that of a peacock in my car.  I must admit I fancy it and of all things the very next day I went to JC Penney to use my cherished $10.00 off of $10.oo coupon and as I rummaged around their Christmas clearance items I came across the most stunning cross adorned with lavender and dark purple gems.  Not only was it on clearance but there was an additional 20% off so the cross which had been priced at $30.00 ended up costing $2.60.  I was so thrilled with my newfound item I wanted to run up the nearest wall and do a backflip against it just as Tina Tech did in Flashdance but since I possess no aerobic skills whatsoever and didn’t want to be tackled by security I kept my euphoria under wraps.  I was also able to buy a blouse and headband also at a drastically reduced price and after my coupon the total came to an exhilarating $1.07.   Since my cross is so sparkly and eye-catching rather than keep it hidden in some drawer I decided to hang that in my car as well.  So I now have the most gleaming tricolored star shaped crystal consisting of pink, aquamarine and clear which hangs below my rear-view mirror, a dreamcatcher on the right side and a cross on the left.  All are visually appealing and while I don’t need any help from the dreamcatcher while driving hopefully having that cross will further protect me from the dangerous speed demons and absent-minded people consumed with whatever is on their phones which apparently takes precedence over focusing 100% of their attention on the road.  I can only imagine what St. Christopher, the patron saint for travelers must think when he looks down at the innumerable people texting, taking photos of themselves and the many other things they do on their cellular devices while behind the wheel.      ...

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Most Memorable Holidate

Posted by on Apr 1, 2018 in Blog | 0 comments

Not only did Valentine’s Day happen to fall on Ash Wednesday but the fact that April Fool’s Day is on, of all days Easter Sunday has me questioning whether or not the usual pranks which take place on this most mischievous day will still occur, will be less or possibly more.  April Fool’s Day for me is not as much about practical jokes as it is a sign of spring but for many this is the one day out of the year they can have a field day playing tricks on others.  But with it being Easter which is a huge day for family get-togethers I wonder whether relatives and friends will make time to pull off some amusing antics.  Probably so.   I’m sure countless Catholics who’ve abstained from eating any type of meat for the past six Fridays are especially looking forward to today’s/tonight’s festivities that is unless of course they’re vegetarians to begin with which won’t make a bit of difference.  What I’m really hoping for is if Peter Cottontale hippity hoppitied his furry ass to my front door with $100 million in his basket.  F*ck the chocolate I just want the lettuce and who better to give it to me than the Easter Bunny?                                                                                                                P.S.  In my last entry several days ago titled Doggonit!  I described my deepest affection towards dogs and of all times about an hour prior to leaving for work I had my new tube of Covergirl lip gloss  which is glittery silver and sparkly beyond compare.  Apparently my dog thought so too since I heard him jump off my bed only to see my lip gloss clenched tightly between his teeth.  The more I tried to take it from him the more he growled and since I didn’t want to have my hand savagely attacked I gave him a piece of chicken and he finally let it go.  While the tube wasn’t punctured it had the cutest teeth marks embedded in it.  Of course at the time I was irate but thankfully I was able to exchange it for a new one.  When I handed it to the girl at the service counter and explained what had happened I felt like a student trying to use that famed expression  “The dog ate my homework” to their teacher only in this case my dog really did chew it as evident of the bite marks on the tube.  Speaking of that saying which has been used on teachers for years I’m sure it really has happened to people in that their dogs have gotten a hold of their homework or other assignments just like in the Motley Crue video “Smokin’ in the Boys Room” when the Doberman Pinscher really did eat his homework.  So what happens?  What must they do to prove to their instructors or in certain cases professors that their dog or other pet really destroyed their work?  Will the educator give them a break by believing them and offer them a chance to make up the assignment or would they think their intelligence was being insulted and flat out give the student a zero?  Not really sure but it’s rather thought-provoking, don’tcha think?      ...

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